


Hardest To Love

by porcelainsimplicity, Scarlett_Phoenix



Category: X-Men (Movies), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-11
Updated: 2014-06-11
Packaged: 2018-02-04 07:28:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1770757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/porcelainsimplicity/pseuds/porcelainsimplicity, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scarlett_Phoenix/pseuds/Scarlett_Phoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the night before Cuba, and things get steamy. Charles gets flustered, Erik isn't hesitant, but that doesn't stop them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hardest To Love

**Author's Note:**

> We came up with this late at night. Inspired by FC and DOFP. Hope you like it and reviews are nice!

Friends, I watched us as we changed  
The feelings in my headspace rearranged  
I want you more than I've wanted anyone  
Isn't that dangerous?  
The anticipation before the kiss  
Mirrored in my shaking lips  
Oh god I feel so unprepared  
The two of us so out of place  
My feelings written on my face  
Got what I wanted but now I'm scared  
What if we ruin it all  
And we love like fools  
And all we have we lose  
I don't want you to go  
But I want you so  
So tell me what  
Tell me what to choose  
lauren aquilina – fools  


Charles watched carefully as Erik slid a knight into place, then stared at the board before breaking out into a huge smile. He moved his rook and started to laugh. “Checkmate! Another?”

Erik sighed, once again losing a game. He reached for his glass, downed it, and looked at Charles. “Do you honestly want to play another match knowing that we could possibly die tomorrow?” he asked his friend, setting his glass down on the side table.

Charles looked at him, studying the look on Erik's face. “Well, my friend, what do you suggest we do then? I know I'm going to get very little sleep tonight, and I rather thought we were going to spend the time playing chess.”

Erik quickly glanced at his friend's drink, noticing how low it was before meeting Charles's gaze. “Would you like another glass?” he asked as he stood to refill his own.

Charles reached for his glass and polished it off before handing the glass to Erik. “I can never turn down a good drink, my friend.”

Erik picked up the decanter and laughed. “We've almost drank the whole thing Charles.”

“Might as well finish it off then,” Charles said, laughing. “Besides, we might die tomorrow.”

“Yes, we may,” Erik said, filling both their glasses up. He handed Charles his and then reached for his own as he noticed the side of the room filled with books along the wall. Wanting to take a closer look at Charles's collection, he walked over to it with his drink in hand. “Quite a collection you have here, Charles. Is there anything you don't own?”

Charles laughed and stood up, walking over to him. “There are plenty of things I don't own, Erik. But I cannot say that a good book is amongst them. Have you read Salinger? _The Catcher In The Rye _? I know it's about a teenager, but the themes of identity, belonging, connection, and alienation, they just resonated with me."__

“I can't say I have,” Erik frowned and took a large sip of his drink. “It does sound interesting though.” 

Charles polished off his drink and then set it on the shelf and reached across Erik to grab the book from its place. "You can borrow my copy if you'd like, provided of course that you return it. Raven never returns my books and I have to go hunting for them in her room. She says she forgets but I think she does it on purpose because she knows how much it bothers me not to have my books returned to me. It all goes back to when I was a schoolboy..." 

"Charles." 

"...and I used to get my books stolen from me by the older kids..." 

"Charles." 

"...who thought I was easy pickings. I had some fun with them once I realized what I could do with my mind, let me tell you. But the book..." 

"Charles," Erik said forcefully, finally getting the other man's attention. "Shut up." 

“Why?” Charles asked, their bodies now barely inches apart. 

“Because,” Erik said, finishing his glass and setting it down. He tilted his head forward and kissed Charles. The kiss was short and quick but both were left breathless. “Because that's why.” 

Charles gulped in a deep breath as he felt Erik's arms wrap around his waist. Erik was kissing him again before he knew what was happening, and Charles leaned as close to him as he could get before the thought of the fact that he was kissing Erik actually formalized in his head. 

He broke away abruptly, pushing Erik an arm's length away from him. “What are we doing?” he eventually got out, too distracted from the look in Erik's eyes and the want he knew was radiating from his. “I mean, what, why, how, why did you...” 

“It's like I said before, Charles. We could die tomorrow without ever knowing what this is between us. I don't want to live without knowing what this could have been if I lost you,” Erik said with his voice low. “Would you like to know?” he asked, taking a step closer to Charles. 

Charles sighed as Erik pulled him forward and kissed him again, and this time he found himself wrapping his arms around Erik's neck, pulling him closer. No matter how close they got, it wasn't close enough. Charles finally broke away to get some much needed air, then immediately pulled Erik back into a kiss. They stood there, locked together, until the point where they could hardly breathe, and then broke apart quickly, gasping for air. 

Charles glanced over at the clock, but before he could say anything, Erik pulled him into another kiss, his hands roaming the expanse of Charles's back. Charles groaned and leaned into the touch, but eventually he broke away. “If we're going to do this,” he said, breathing heavily, “we should do it right. Not here in the study, not while the kids are still awake.” 

As much as Erik disliked the idea and would like to have continued things where they were, he knew Charles was right. Someone could walk in at any minute. They needed to be somewhere more private. “Where would you like to go?” he asked, still keeping his hold on Charles. 

“I think my bedroom would be best,” Charles breathed out, failing to resist the urge to pull Erik into another kiss. “I could go down to the kitchen, get us a bottle of wine. You could meet me in there and then, we could...we could see where this leads." 

Erik smiled. “Will ten minutes be long enough?” he asked as he brought their bodies closer together. 

“Too long,” Charles breathed out, diving in for another kiss, one that Erik prolonged for as long as he possibly could, “and yet probably long enough. I'll get the wine. You get...whatever it is you need to get.” 

“Well then,” Erik began, pinning Charles against the bookshelf, their bodies pressed together. The glasses on the shelf clinked together, but neither of them cared. He kissed Charles again, long and hard. Just when Charles was ready to beg him for more, Erik broke the kiss and stepped away with a smile. “I shall see you soon then,” he said as he walked towards the door. 

Charles leaned his head back against the shelf and took several deep breaths before he followed Erik to the door, walking the opposite way down the hall towards the kitchen. He had just the bottle of wine in mind. He only hoped they would be able to keep their hands off each other long enough to enjoy it. 

\-------------------------------- 

Erik paced around Charles's bedroom floor, unsure of what was keeping the other man. Charles could have sent him a message telepathically; however, whatever had kept him, he was sure it was probably important and Charles didn't think of it. Maybe this was a bad idea, but the kiss still lingering on his lips reassured him otherwise. It had been almost thirty minutes until he heard the doorknob turn. 

Charles waltzed in with a bottle of wine, two glasses, and an apologetic look on his face. “I am so sorry, but Raven cornered me in the kitchen with some sort of appearance related crisis that I don't think I completely understand and am unsure if I want to.” 

Charles set the bottle and the glasses down on the bedside table and reached for Erik, pulling him into a kiss. But as soon as his lips touched Erik's, his mind was filled with the image of another kiss entirely. He pulled away and stared at Erik with some anger. “My sister, Erik? You kissed my sister?” 

“You said you wouldn't look inside my head,” Erik said with the same amount of anger. “I didn't plan it. She was there in my bed when I went to my room, there in her nonblue form. What was I supposed to do?” 

“What?” Charles nearly shouted and Erik was sure someone might have heard if they walked by. 

“It was an act of letting her know she's beautiful. She's having trouble accepting herself and honestly, I think Hank is filling her head with silly ideas.” Erik could still see the shock on Charles's face. “What? I'm here with you, not her. I don't think of her that way. You should know that,” he tried to reassure. 

Charles took a deep breath and ran his hands through his hair. “Hank's been trying to come up with a serum to normalize their appearance. Perhaps that scenario did not work out the way he or she had hoped. Wine? I could use a good drink now." 

"Yes, please,” Erik said as he watched Charles pour their glasses, taking one once it was offered. “Only one?” he asked with an eyebrow raised. 

Charles took a large sip from his glass and then looked up at Erik. “Depending on how far this goes, it may take the whole bottle to get me through it. How far is this going to go, Erik? Because I've never...I mean, I've had sex of course, just never with...with...” 

“A man?” Erik finished for him. 

“Yes,” Charles said seriously before taking another large sip from his glass. “Have you...you know?” 

Erik took a long sip from his glass before he answered. “No. I haven't at all. This would be the first for me as well.” 

“Right,” Charles said, downing the rest of his glass. “How do we do this then? Do we even know what to do? I mean, I know what to do I just...I'm not making any sense at all am I? Whatever have you done to me?” 

Erik came closer to Charles. “The very same thing you've done to me,” he whispered in his ear as he wrapped his arms around him. He looked at Charles once more and before he could say anything, Erik kissed him again, slowly. 

Charles let himself get lost in the kiss for a moment, but broke it quickly. “You probably need to put your glass down, Erik.” 

Erik chuckled as he unwrapped his arms from Charles's waist and brought the glass to his lips, downing the contents before setting it next to Charles's. 

Charles immediately went back into his arms, kissing Erik slowly and languidly. No kiss had ever felt so good. Erik's arms tightened around Charles's waist and he maneuvered themselves closer to the bed. Charles broke the kiss and rested his head in the nape of Erik's neck, breathing his scent in deeply. “The bed. There's a bed. I know this is obvious but I feel it needs to be pointed out." 

“A bed? Really?” Erik joked and laughed. “You know,” he said while pulling away slightly so Charles could look at him, “we don't have to do anything just yet. We could play a game. Something and take things slow. What would you like?” 

“Slow?” Charles stuttered out. “Yes, yes, slow. Slow is good. You know what we need? We need another drink. That's what we need.” 

Charles broke away from Erik and walked back to the table, grabbing the bottle and refilling both glasses. When he turned around, Erik was sitting on the bed, and Charles nearly dropped both glasses. “Bed. You're sitting on the bed. Alright.” 

Charles slowly walked over to Erik and after handing him his glass, sat down on the bed next to him. “Shall we toast?” 

Erik desperately wanted to take a drink right away, and from what he could tell of Charles, he needed one just as badly. He stared down at the liquid in his glass with a few little choices running through his mind. “Uh,” he paused and swallowed hard. Erik turned his body so he could see Charles better and lifted his glass. “To firsts,” he said, sounding cheerful. 

Charles already had wine pouring into his mouth when Erik spoke, but he immediately spit it out over the carpet. “What?” he shrieked, looking at Erik like he was crazy. “Are you insane? Firsts? That's going to calm me down? Firsts?" 

“I...that was what came to mind. You're the one that said we should toast. What would you have chosen?” Erik drank a large amount of wine before he added, “that might leave a stain on your carpet,” in all hopes of changing the subject. 

Charles looked down at the white carpet that was now stained red, thought for a moment about how expensive that carpet must have been when his mother and Kurt had put it in, and started to laugh. “Stained the carpet with wine while I'm trying to have sex with Erik Lensherr. I'm sure the maid is going to love that explanation.” 

Charles finished off his glass and fell back onto the bed, still laughing. “Oh god, Erik. Well, at least if we die tomorrow, I've gotten one more good laugh in." 

Erik laughed with Charles, taking both their glasses and setting them down away from the bed. He moved, tilting himself towards Charles, planting both hands near his arms. Erik lowered his head and kissed Charles slowly, breaking the kiss quickly and staring down at Charles. 

Charles reached up and pulled Erik back to him, their lips tangling together again. This kiss was more hurried, more wanton, and Charles felt ridiculous for it. It was so different with a co-ed that he knew he'd never see again. But this was Erik, and Erik was special, and this was special too. 

And they might die tomorrow, so why the hell not? 

Charles broke the kiss when he needed air, smiling up at Erik. “You know what? I think I need another glass of wine.” 

“Anything you want,” Erik said and gave Charles another quick kiss. He then sat up quickly and felt lightheaded, but that wouldn't stop anything happening tonight. He reached down to grab their glasses and filled them back up with wine. Charles was now sitting up and Erik gave him his glass. “Shall we make another toast?” he smirked. 

“No,” Charles said, drinking the whole glass in one long sip. He laid back on the bed and sighed. “You know, Erik, you have a very groovy mutation. I could explain it to you in scientific terms if you'd like. That always worked on the co-eds at Oxford." 

“I'm not one of those co-eds,” Erik replied. “And, I believe, you, my friend, are very drunk,” he added after he downed his own glass, looking over at Charles. 

“If I'm drunk then so are you,” Charles pointed out. “You've had just as much to drink as I have, if not more.” 

“Roughly about the same amount and I think we've had enough for now.” Erik again took both their glasses and set them down on the carpet. He took his previous position over Charles and kissed him hungrier than before. 

Charles's hands came up to tangle in Erik's hair as the kiss deepened even more. When they broke apart for air, Erik started trailing kisses along Charles's jawline, grinning into them as he heard Charles make noises he knew he would never admit to the next morning. 

Charles was hot, too hot, overwhelmingly hot, and he pulled Erik away from him, staring up at him with hungry eyes. “I need to take my sweater off.” 

“Hot indeed,” Erik said aloud as he picked up that projection from Charles, hoping no one else would. He brought both of them up into a sitting position and undid the buttons of Charles's sweater, and once that was off, he took off Charles's shirt as well. He tossed them onto the floor and met Charles's lips for another deepened kiss. 

Charles shook his head into the kiss and broke it, suddenly feeling very naked compared to Erik. “Yours as well. I'm not the only one getting their kit off here." 

“Point proven,” Erik said, taking off his turtleneck quickly. He kissed Charles again, lowering themselves back down onto the bed. He shifted over Charles until Charles was taking half his body weight, and the skin on skin contact only fueled their hunger. Both were panting hard when the kiss broke and Erik started trailing gentle kisses all over Charles's body. 

Charles let his eyes close and concentrated on the path Erik's lips were taking, while putting up as many mental blocks as he could think of in his state. The last thing he wanted was this projected through the whole house. 

Erik, however, was projecting like crazy. _Hot, sexy, god, why didn't we do this sooner? We should have done this sooner. Need him. Need. Need. Need. Him. Only him. Charles. God, Charles._

Charles felt his breathing quicken just from Erik's thoughts, and when he glanced down to where Erik was placing kisses just above his trousers, he let out a noise that he didn't even know he could make. 

Erik looked up at him, his fingers hovering at the top of Charles's trousers. “Charles, do you want me to stop?” 

Charles took a few deep breaths, then shook his head no. He couldn't even find his voice. 

Erik grinned in a way Charles had never seen before and nodded. “Okay.” 

\-------------------------------- 

It was early morning when Erik woke. His left arm was numb and he wondered why until he saw Charles by his side, curled up to him. Erik's hand rested on Charles's hip while the rest of his arm was pinned under his weight. He also noticed the headache that had started, but this was one pain he took pleasure in. It was a reminder of the wonderful night he and Charles had. No regrets whatsoever. 

Erik decided to take in the moment of a sleeping Charles no matter how bad his arm started to feel. Looking at the clock, he knew that in two hours or so, they would have to get the others up and get ready to leave. They had to be up at some point. 

He started moving his fingers, as much as he could manage, slowly up and down Charles's hip. “Charles,” he whispered softly. Nothing. He called his name again, a bit louder but still soft. 

Charles let out a soft noise and batted at the fingers at his hip, making Erik smile. 

“Charles,” he tried again, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. “I can barely feel my arm." 

Charles groaned and cracked open an eye, seeing the room colored by the gray haze of predawn. “Sleep, Erik.” 

“You're on my arm,” Erik said, “and I have to get back to my room before the kids wake up.” 

Charles laid there for a moment, then rolled off of Erik's arm, turning his head towards him and flopping it back down onto the pillow. “Kids? Don't make us sound so domestic, Erik. It's only been a night.” 

“A night that I'll remember for the rest of my life." 

Charles smiled, thinking about what became of them last night. He then let out a groan as the hangover began to kick in to its fullest. “How drunk did we get last night?” he asked, unsure if he wanted to know the answer. 

Erik couldn't help but smile as he moved over Charles, pressing their bodies together. “Drunk enough for you to use one of your pickup lines on me,” he smirked. “And I quote, 'you know, Erik, you have a very groovy mutation,'” he said, doing his best impersonation of Charles, adding extra emphasis on the word groovy to make it sound exactly like him. 

Charles groaned and shoved Erik's shoulder. “Oh fuck off.” 

“You're the one that said it, my friend.” 

“I can't believe I did that,” Charles said, starting to laugh. “God, I was using that on co-eds a few months ago and now here I am with you. Not sure which is better.” 

“Hey!” Erik exclaimed, “I'm way better than a co-ed!" 

“Yes, yes, you are." 

Both men laughed, but quickly grew silent when they suddenly locked eyes. The heat between the two grew. Erik noticed that Charles glanced at his lips before meeting his gaze, and decided to lean down and plant a kiss on Charles's lips, but he was interrupted. 

“Don't,” Charles said, pleading with his eyes for Erik to stop. “Don't ruin it. Let it be what it was, and if we ever get the chance to enjoy such pleasure again, well, we'll be prepared.” 

Erik started to speak but Charles put a finger to his lips. “Someone's up, Erik. If you're going to go, you had better go now, before they get to this part of the house." 

Erik let out a long breath of defeat. “Okay,” he said, knowing what his friend said was true. He quickly got out of bed without saying another word, grabbing his pants off the floor and slipping them on. “I will be back for the rest of the stuff later. I will see you soon, then,” he said as he walked towards the door, looking at Charles one last time before he left. 

\-------------------------------- 

The sun dipped low in the Paris sky, sending streaks of color everywhere one looked. The sound of the Champs-Élysées started to dull outside the balconies of the hotel, traffic dwindling as people headed home for the night. Two rooms sat side by side on the third floor, doors open to enjoy the fresh air and the beautiful scenery. In a different life, there would have been one room, and lounging on the balcony enjoying the sunset. In a different life, they wouldn't have been there to stop a murder, or angry enough to think of murdering each other. In a different life, everything would be changed. 

They didn't realize it, but the men in these two rooms were both thinking of a night long ago, of red wine spilled on a white carpet, of bodies being pinned together against a bookcase, of pleasure they both know they'll never experience again. 

Except they could, if they would only just talk to each other and learn to trust one another again. 


End file.
